We support the LGBTQ community, believe we are all equal and create funny jokes to laugh at together.
Among the funniest jokes that most people know are those gay jokes.
Although some are mischievous, we can’t deny that there is enough to make you laugh out loud without being too offensive.
A happy relationship is like a good coffee: aromatic, energizing and full of funny moments.
That’s why, without offending anyone, we have prepared several gay court jokes that capture a dose of teasing, irony and good-quality humor.
Therefore, we have also prepared a selection of friendly gay jokes for you that we invite you to discover in the rows below.
A newlywed guy tells his co-workers:
– My wife cooks excellent and always my favorite foods, her head never hurts, she watches football with me
– We even keep up with the same team, we go fishing together…
“Yeah,” says one of them. It seems that with you, these gays, nothing is the same as the rest of us!
Friendly Gay Jokes
A man enters a store and shouts at him:
– In just a few minutes, I’ll rape someone!
Look at the saleswoman and ask:
– What’s your name, woman?
– Maria.
– My mother’s name is Maria, and I love her too. So I’m not raping you.
What’s your name, handsome gay man?
– George… but my friends always call me Maria!
– What happens when three gays are glued together in a train line?
– I’m at a birthday party, and the one in the middle is the one who turns…
A guy comes home and starts screaming:
– Daddy!
When I was walking through the park tonight, a gay help me!
“But why didn’t you run from him?”
– You’re crazy?
How could I run away with these heels on?
According to a press release issued by the Police:
Last night, during the dispersal of a rally of the LGBT community, the special troops lost 17 rubber sticks!
One in four men is said to be gay.
He is one of my group friends.
With all my heart, I hope to be Razvan because he is super cute and has some muscles…
At Fishing
John: Why do you always catch fish and I don’t?
Gymm: Because I know how to use the frame too…
At the doctor:
The doctor told me to give up chocolate and you, if I want to reduce stress.
What did you do?
I gave up on the doctor.
At the gym:
Come on, I did 10 push-ups!
Wow, you are in shape and you look sensational!
Did you do 10 push-ups a month ago?
Yes, but today I made them faster!
On the beach:
Baby, look, a shark!
Don’t be scared, my dear, it’s just a dolphin.
But it looks like a shark!
It’s probably Halloween at sea.
Two friends meet.
One says: “I’ve lost 10 kg in the last few weeks!”
The other replies: “Wow, well done! How did you do it?”
The first says: “I have a new boyfriend who makes me always run after him to pay for his shopping.”
A guy calls his partner: “Where are you?”
Partner: “At the library.”
The first: “Great, I’m calm now that you’re not at home to eat everything from the fridge!”
One Liners Gay Jokes
Discussions with parents:
– Mom, could I buy that dress from the shop window?
– I think it’s a little old-fashioned, George!
Question: How do you ask if a place is free in a gay restaurant?
Answer: Can I get stuck in your “chair”?
From March 1:
“I’d like to give you this thing as a gift, as a symbol of the boundless love I have for you,” said gay John, full of emotion.
– Alas, what a beautiful gesture! Thanks, John!
– With pleasure, George, my gay friend!
A gentleman sits on a bench in a park next to another gentleman. The latter is getting closer to the former and getting closer.
Finally, the first one is pulled further, further away.
At one point, a strong policeman appears, only muscles.
– So, police officer, this man doesn’t leave me alone. He’s coming to me!
– Well, you started: what are you doing in our park?
– I love to run my hand through your long, silky hair.
– How romantic, darling!… Tell me more.
– However, John, you should cut his nose, chest and legs a little more.
A gay also goes to the gynecologist:
– Doctor, I think I’m pregnant!
The doctor starts explaining to her how she gets pregnant, the ovaries, the egg, the sperm, the uterus, etc., so he can’t get pregnant.
At which guy, desperate:
– Doctor, I know exactly what you’re saying, but I’m afraid it might be an ectopic pregnancy!
Two guys were talking to each other in a bar:
– He made me gay today, says the first one, very upset.
– And what did you do?
– I hit her in the head with a handkerchief to see green stars!
After the Chornobyl disaster, an announcement was repeated on Radio One:
Here, a radioactive man is looking for a radioactive man.
Two gays go to the mountains.
One of them asks:
– Do we stop somewhere?
On the wedding night, the bride is forced to admit:
– My dear, I have to tell you. I’ve never dealt with men before.
– Be calm, my dear. I know what you mean! I only dealt with them!
Two astronauts return from space after a year on an orbital station.
– What was the most enjoyable event you had in space?
Asked a reporter.
– Our engagement!
British researchers have concluded:
There are no lesbians.
There are only women who haven’t met a man yet!
The pinnacle of multiplication: more and more gays appear every day, even though they can’t reproduce with each other!
According to an opinion poll, 90% of women admit that they do not like men dressed in pink.
Also, 90% of gay men dressed in pink admitted that they do not like women.
Share these gay jokes with your friends and laugh together.
Gay jokes, meant to make you laugh out loud
There are many jokes worldwide, but among the most successful are those gay jokes, at which almost everyone laughs.
Yes, even them.
Therefore, we have prepared a selection of the most successful ones, making you laugh.
At the court, a homosexual is asked by the judge:
– Accused, what did you do with the poor nun?
Why did you rape her?
Only you don’t like women!
– Well, Mr. Judge, from the back, he looked like Zorro, and from the front, like George Michael.
I: How do you ask in a gay restaurant if a seat is free?
A: Can I sit in your chair and tell you some gay jokes?
Two friends are discussing:
– Did you see on the news about the four homosexuals from Constanta who attacked a woman?
– What did the bastards do to him?
– Two held her, one cut her hair, and the last told her gay jokes all this time!
Johnny went shopping with her mother!
– Mom, could I buy that dress in the window?
– I think it’s already a bit old-fashioned, Johnny.
Between two gays:
– Know that your boyfriend gossiped about me behind my back.
– You really surprised me with what you told me because he cannot do two things at once.
A gay was caught by a policeman and taken to the station.
Before writing the report, the policeman said:
– And now, let’s move on to reconstructing the facts
– Mr. policeman, I would ask you to let me catch my breath while you read some gay jokes and then I’m ready to start again!
In a gay bar in New York, Ion, a Transylvanian get-beget, also arrives. He doesn’t realize where he is and wants to go to the toilet. Unfortunately, three cubicles were in the toilet, all with closed doors.
Hit the first one.
– Busy!
Knock on the second one.
– Busy!
Strike at third.
– Get in!
What do three gays do when their living room lamp breaks?
The first called for the electrician.
The second one makes the coffee.
The third rubs his palms and says:
– Oh, I have such great emotions.
Two gays were also talking to each other:
– Which star do you like?
– Justin Bieber
– Well, man, did you freak out or something: did you start liking girls?
– Doctor, I am gay. What should I do?
– Shut up and kiss me!
A soldier goes to his superior.
Commander, there are homosexuals in our unit!
– How do you know?
– I wanted to go out and noticed my lipstick was gone!
Inscription on the door of a gay club:
The entrance through the back!
Two gays get lost in the forest. One says:
– Let’s go back.
– Well, with you too! You come back first.
Mike asks Johnny:
– I am asking you a question you can only answer with Yes or No.
Johnny: – Good. I agree.
Mike: – Does your mother know that you are gay?
At the psychologist:
– Madam, since when did you notice homosexual behavior in your son?
– I don’t know what to say, doctor, but he has been sitting on the bottle since he was little!
We hope these friendly gay jokes make you laugh.
The best gay jokes you probably didn’t know.
When it comes to gay jokes, everyone knows at least a few.
We have also compiled a selection of gay people jokes for you, which we do not consider offensive, and which we invite you to read in the lines below.
Which gay jokes among them did you know?
LGBTQ jokes
Bula goes to her father and says:
– Dad, I have news that might surprise you, but I decided I don’t want to keep any secrets from you: I’m gay!
– Yes ma, well, you look like your mother, say better.
Who smoked in the kitchen and didn’t open the window?
– Dad, you don’t understand. I’m gay.
I like men!
– Yes, ma, I understood the first time.
You look like your ma, I just told you!
If you were in bed between the most beautiful woman in the world and a passionate homosexual, who would you turn your back to read the best LGBTQ jokes?
In a divorce proceeding, the judge asks the plaintiff:
– Madam, are you sure of what you are asking for? Do you want a divorce for character compatibility?
Didn’t you make a mistake, and could it be the opposite?
The woman answers:
– No, Mr. Judge! It’s for too much compatibility. Let me explain: I like movies, and so does my husband! I like going to the beach, and so does he! I like to go shopping, and so does he! I like men, and so does he!
Gay people jokes
– Do you know how homosexuals invite each other to dinner?
– Are you coming to my place to drink something?
– Where have you been to have this big smile on your face?
– At the doctor.
– What kind of doctor?
– Proctologist.
– And?
– I liked it. I’m going again tomorrow!
Bula was walking down the street with a hunted eye.
Strula sees him and asks:
– Johnny, where did you get that bruise from?
– Well, I was also walking on New York streets.
I met a famous singer and shouted to him: “You’re gay”!
– So?
– And he hit me so hard with the purse that I saw green stars.
– Dad, dad, a kid at school says I’m popular.
– Give him a firm punch in the face!
– But he’s so cute, how could I do that!
A gay man says to his partner: “I have an app that finds my perfect match.”
The other asks: “And? What does he say?”
The first answer: “That I should install another application”.
A guy tells his partner: “I wrote you a great love poem!”
Partner: “How sweet, can I hear it?”
Guy: “Not really, I don’t have the lyrics yet, but I started with gay jokes.”
Two friends, one of whom is gay, meet at the gym.
One says, “Hey, I saw you lifting heavy today!”
The other: “Yes, I broke up with John and today I tried to open my jar of homemade pickles by myself.”
Two lovers are looking at old pictures.
One says: “We’ve changed a lot over the years, haven’t we?”
The other: “Yes, you look better, but I have better pictures. Let’s read some more gay jokes.”
A gay man lends his partner’s car.
He tells her: “Don’t worry, I’ll take great care of her!”
He returns home with a scratched car and a broken headlight.
“Don’t look at me like that, a pigeon wanted to commit suicide!”
Why are gay men likened to the blizzard?
You don’t know when they’re coming, you don’t know how many inches they’ll reach, and you don’t even know how long it will last… Better read some gay jokes, right?
Why did modern men stop crying?
So that the mascara doesn’t run off their face.
The best gay jokes
Two homosexuals also discuss with each other.
-Did you find out the big news?
The new law was voted on.
So now we are officially allowed!
– I don’t care, says the second, outraged and frowning.
I, for one, will fight on.
-Until?
– Until it becomes mandatory!
I: Who is the biggest homosexual?
A: The Rector.
A soldier goes to his commander and says:
– Allow me to report! There are people among us!
– What are you basing your statement on, soldier?
– Well, on the fact that my lipstick and mascara disappeared while I was in the bathroom!
90% of women admitted that they don’t like men dressed in pink.
Not surprisingly, 90% of the men dressed in pink admitted that they don’t like women.
Two gays also go on a trip to the mountains.
One of them asks:
-Listen, I’m tired from climbing all the time.
At the next forest, shall we rest a little?
A man walks through the forest.
At one point, he sees an indicator board:
“Attention, Homosexuals!”
– Ah, he says to himself, who knows what idiots put this here.
Next, another table:
“Attention, Homosexuals!”
– All those ticks.
He meets the forester:
– Mister forester, have you heard that there are gays in the forest?
– I don’t know, let me ask my wife: John, did you hear something?
Bored of life in the city, Tom bought a house in the country, surrounded by valleys and forests.
After six months of loneliness, a bearded, unkempt guy appears at his door and tells him:
– I’m your neighbor, Bill, who lives across the valley.
I’m having a party tonight and thought I’d invite you too.
– Oh, how good! says Tom. I was really bored.
– There will be something to drink, maybe even some fights.
I hope you do not mind.
– It’s OK. I think I can handle it.
– And there will be love.
– Oh, how good! I am a guy who is open to any challenges.
How do you think I should dress?
– Does not matter.
Anyway, it will be just the two of the lesbians and us on the mountain on the other side of the canyon!
Do gays live better?
Yes, because they do not have women in their ranks.
What do three gays sitting on top of each other mean?
The one in the middle has a birthday.
Two homosexuals were arguing in the shower. Why?
– Today, none of them wanted to bend over for soap.
A beggar knocks on the door of a gay couple and a super well-groomed guy, with lipstick, mascara, with his hands on his hips and ready for scandal opens the door:
– What else do you want, you loser?
– You know, if you had some empty beer bottles that I could sell…
– Do I look like I’m drinking beer?!
– Aaa… then at least you can find some empty bottles of vinegar…
Two friends, one of whom is gay, are having a drink:
– What should I do, because my boyfriend is beating me the way that we have been together for 2 years and he wants to be dressed in white?
– You enroll him in karate.