The best corny joke to say: I don’t advise you
A corny joke will help you to break the ice of a discussion.
For example, you can start to talk with a girl like that:
Hi, do you fall from heaven, or am I just lucky to meet you?
- Can you give me some salt from the table?
- Why don’t I take it to you?
- Because I don’t want to escape the salt from my hand and to wrangle with you
- Ha, ha, ha…
My girlfriend believes that I am a corny guy.
I tell her that I am tough inside but sensible outside.
I am trying to be cool at my school, but my colleagues tell me I am trying to be a star…
What’s at the bottom of the stirring sea?
A nervous wreck.
How do you stop a bull from charging?
Cancel credit card.
What is the favorite musical instrument of a skeleton?
Trom’s bone.
Funny corny jokes
What illness do you get when you put on Christmas decorations? Tinnitus.
How do the billboards speak? Sign language.
What do you call an unpredictable room?
A free Canon.
Corny dad jokes
Dad, can you buy me a gift?
No, because Santa will bring it to you.
Why was the sand wet?
Because of the great weed.
Really corny jokes
How did the hairdresser win the race?
He knew a shortcut.
What is orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
The ideal wife is the one who deals with the cultural level of her husband.
In the morning, he does a circus, and in the evening, he plays.
Corny jokes for kids
A couple of young couples are at the table, and she tells them:
Baby, I know you won’t believe it, but I fried this soup alone.
After 12 months of wedding planning, the big day has come.
There are several hours, and I greatly regret that I will not be able to see your face when you receive the text message:
“This wedding was a scam on April 1!”
The husband arrives early and finds his wife in bed with another man.
– Who is this individual?!
He shouted, very angry.
– You are right, dear, says the wife, turning to the other:
Who are you, and how do you call yourself, sir?
Do you love corny jokes? You must read this cute jokes.
Corny jokes for her
On New Year’s Eve, Mrs. Smith gave birth to 5 children.
The children are in a healthy hospital, but doctors hope to keep Mr. Smith alive.
My dear, why are you so corny?
Because I like to be like that!
In any marriage, someone is always right, but the man is never!
A man, before the engagement, goes to his father and tells him:
– Dad, I found a woman just like my mother!
– Well, what do you want?
Do you want compassion?
He asks his father.
No offense to corny jokes
There have always been and will be many evil jokes in the future.
In fact, any occasion is good for the most haughty to bring out new and corny jokes.
We also have some fun, funny samples that we hope will bring a smile to your lips.
How does a man do gymnastics exercises on the beach?
He sucks his belly whenever he sees some good guys wearing only bikinis.
What does a man look like who makes his supplies?
Buy two cans of beer instead of one.
What did God say after He created man?
Yes, it’s good, but I can overcome myself.
Why do most men’s sports play on artificial grass?
So that the players are not tempted to stop playing and start playing.
Why are so many re-enactments at the stages of sports?
Because after 30 seconds, men forget everything that happened.
– Listen, do you have a favorite writer?
– Yes, he is my boyfriend.
– Wow, that’s interesting.
And what does he write?
– Checks!
– I hope that the gift I am preparing to give you as a gift for your day will be fine on your delicate finger, my dear.
– Thank you, dear! Just be careful not to be too expensive.
– No worries! I have never seen any expensive fingers before.
Two grandparents tell each other:
– Tomorrow, my nephew is getting married!
– Congratulations! And where is the bride from?
– From Facebook.
But I don’t know where this country comes from.
Corny jokes meaning
Two friends discuss at the Mall:
-Dear, what an interesting model you have on the chain pendant. Where did you get it from!
-You, and with you, I used the engagement rings received.
Discussion in the southern area of the United States of America:
– Did you hear, James, that a black man would become the president of America?
– Yes?
Do you realize how happy his master must be?
Johnny asks his father:
– Dad, did you get married at church or marital status?
– Drunk, my son, drunk, he sighs resignedly.
Johnny, in the army:
– Doctor, I’m so sorry!
– What makes you sick?
– Army!
The parents ask Johnny:
– What would you like: a brother or a sister?
– Nothing. I can handle you alone!
In the exam, the subject was:
“Prove that the chair in the chair is invisible.”
All corny students write 5-6 pages each, but the teacher gives only one 10.
This is taken by Johnny, who had written only two words on the sheet:
Which chair?
In a car repair shop:
– And now, says the foreman to his apprentice, the first lesson:
To learn how to marvel at the hood’s opening.
A couple goes to the mountains:
She:
– Honey, this landscape leaves me speechless.
He:
– Perfect, here we set up the tent!
– Honey, I’m pregnant!
What would you like it to be?
– A lousy joke!
Corniest jokes to read
– Grandpa, do you know how to act like a blackbird?
– Not.
But why?
– Dad said we’d be rich when you were with her.
Q: How did the Grand Canyon form?
A: A Jew dropped a coin into a crack in a mountain.
Q: How was the wire first made?
A: A Scotsman and a Jew saw the same penny coin on the street.
Q: How do you know a Jew became a Christian?
A: He started to like women more than money.
An corny Italian soldier enters a bar, raises two fingers, and says, five beers, please!
– Children, do you know what it means to be a diplomat?
– Think twice before you shut up!
Why are cats the best at video games?
– Because they have nine lives.
The child of a computer scientist asks his father:
– Daddy, why do we have five fingers if the mouse has only two buttons?
What did the number 0 tell the number 8?
“Beautiful belt! Was it on sale?”
What is your parents’ job? The teacher asks.
– Dad is an engineer, says Micheal.
– Dad is a mechanic, says Daniel.
– Dad is a boss, says Johnny.
– How is Johnny? The teacher asks in astonishment.
– He has 1000 people under him.
– What does he do?
– Cut grass in the cemetery.
The peak of the flight: let a fly in the sky of your mouth.
Discussion between father and son about online school:
– What is corny and fast? You know I use a PC, tablet, laptop, and phone. What did you use at school in your time? The son asks.
– The mind!
– Corny joke: What animal is black with red stripes?
– A zebra that has spent too much time in the sun.
– Son, I will leave home for a few days. In my absence, you will be the man in the house.
– Okay, Dad, but don’t stay too long; I don’t like washing dishes.
The pinnacle of patience: To hold water in your mouth until it makes frogs.
The peak of boredom: Start laying eggs and succeed.
Top speed: Run around a pole until you see the back of your head.
The top of the living corny space:
Living in a video camera.
The culmination of irony:
To make a surprise party for a clairvoyant.
The top of the worry:
To whiten your wig.
The peak of dilution:
To dilute water.
Little Johnny’s corny jokes, which maybe you didn’t know!
All peoples love little Johnny! He is the main character in most banks, and we all know at least a few corny jokes.
In fact, most likely, if someone dared to compile an anthology with the sympathetic protagonist of our banks, it would be impossible for him to finish it.
Because new Little Johnny jokes appear every day.
We also present some of them to you in the lines below.
– I was so embarrassed at my wife’s funeral… says little Johnny to a friend. It took six people to climb it up the hill!
– But this is not something so unusual, he answered.
– I know too well, says little Johnny.
But she was cremated.
Bula is waiting for the doctor to come out of surgery and tell him how his wife, who had suffered a serious car accident, is feeling.
The doctor finally comes out and is questioned by Bula:
– Doctor, how is my wife?
– Well, you know, most likely she won’t be able to walk anymore, you’ll have to buy a wheelchair to take her everywhere.
– Woe to me, doctor! Bula wailed.
– And wait, that’s not all, the doctor continued. She couldn’t feed herself.
You’ll have to feed her like a baby, with a spoon, every three hours.
– Doctor, but it’s seriously bad, says Bula, her face getting whiter and whiter.
– Wait, she’s still there. She’ll defecate on her.
She’ll have to use the Spotty. Wash her carefully and give her the cream.
– Come on, doctor, what am I going to do?
– Stay calm because I wanted to do a corny joke with you, says the doctor.
You are ok.