Chuck Norris’ tears cure everything.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is suing BBC, claiming they don’t tell the truth about his adventures.
But, of course, the chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Best Chuck Norris Jokes
If you can find Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from the hit.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his pants. He just rinses them.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry.
The man ate an Indian.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
The Biggest Wall in the world was created to keep Chuck Norris outside.
If you tell Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “One moment until.” And after you ask, “Two seconds until what?” he hits you.
Chuck Norris drives a car covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris once ate three 42 oz. Steaks in one hour.
He spent the first 25 minutes having love. Chuck Norris doesn’t churn butter. He loves sheep and fresh milk to them.
When Chuck Norris pays taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of his person.
Chuck Norris’ fist is the quickest way to knock out a man.
New Chuck Norris Jokes
Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2020 after his flower is Mesopotamia.
Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris arrived.
They are and create a huge implosion.
Chuck Norris once shot down a French fighter plane with his finger and said, “Ohhh!”
Why is Chuck Norris blonde? Because his mother also was! Read more blonde jokes.Chuck Norris is so strong that the water drops away from him when it rains.
Legend has it that Chuck Norris went into the jungle without even a weapon, and when a lion jumped on him, he broke his teeth and left.
Chuck Norris entered the ocean and reached the deepest because the water split in two, making it a corridor.
Funny Chuck Norris
“The official book of jokes about Chuck Norris” combines jokes invented by internet users from the real events of his biography.
It has been proved that Chuck’s attitude regarding people’s memory can’t be called calm or ironic because he got extraordinary popularity and consistent remuneration.
When there are made jokes about Chuck Norris, there is actually practiced wisdom, as the actor says. He also says he has nothing against good humor and often enters the internet and reads jokes about himself.
One of his favorite jokes is, “A cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After two days of terrible suffering, the cobra died”.
Besides this, his son invented another favorite joke:
“Chuck Norris used to eat bullets at breakfast, so be careful when you go to the bathroom after him.”
Best Chuck Norris Jokes for Adults
In an interview, Chuck Norris was asked if he practices karate or is a master of the sport.
“Well… yeah…” Was the reply of the actor.
Then the interviewer asked what kind of belt she should wear to take his money.
He answered, “black… with black tights and a mini skirt.” Thanks to these jokes, many people learned about the less-seen side of the actor.
Always immortal: Chuck Norris jokes
Who among us doesn’t know at least five jokes about Chuck Norris?
They are full of fun. We love them and, in addition, there are always new ones meant to make us laugh to the fullest.
If you want a few more to complete your collection, the ones below are excellent.
It is said that when Alexander Bell invented the telephone when first put it into operation, he already had three missed calls from Chuck Norris!
Chuck Norris never wears a watch. He is the one who decides what time the clock shows.
Chuck Norris spent his first free weekend on Mars.
There are no Martians, but Chuck Norris doesn’t have days off either…
He never reads jokes with Chuck Norris.
Instead, he just looks at the cover and gets the needed information.
Charles Darwin was in great error, and the theory of species evolution is not a reality.
The truth is that all that is now on Earth is just those species that Chuck Norris let survive.
Chuck Norris never sleeps.
He’s just waiting!
The only man who counted to infinity is Chuck Norris!
And twice more!
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, he has more money than you.
There is no “Ctrl” key on Chuck Norris’ computer. Just his picture because he’s in control…
Chuck Norris is obviously the only man in the world who can sneeze with his eyes open and lick his elbow.
As a student, Chuck Norris periodically destroyed the table because he only recognized the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with a single bird.
Some people like to eat frog legs. Chuck Norris thinks he’s too ugly. He prefers to eat snake legs.
Dirty Chuck Norris jokes
It is said that a picture is worth a thousand words.
A poster with chuck Norris makes as many as 1 billion words.
The Bermuda Triangle was formerly known as the Bermuda Square until Chuck Norris hit one of its corners. We all know what happened next.
Chuck Norris once swallowed a whole bottle of sleeping pills. The effect was truly catastrophic. They blinked.
Chuck Norris encountered a bear many years ago while walking through the woods. He was so terrified that he fled north into the Arctic. Also, the fear was so great that all his descendants now have white fur.
Chuck Norris played Russian roulette with a fully loaded pistol and won.
Some people are wearing pajamas with Superman.
But I know Superman is wearing Chuck Norris pajamas.
All this nonsense about global warming doesn’t really exist. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
When he wants to write a letter, Chuck Norris looks at the pen, and the words start writing on paper!
Funny Chuck Norris memes
In 2009 Chuck Norris published a book based on memes about himself.
A new collection of Chuck Norris memes
Ever Immortal: Chuck Norris Jokes!
If one day you feel that nothing is connecting as it should, it is enough to read at least a few Chuck Norris jokes, and you will feel how everything becomes much happier around you.
And, as it is impossible not to adore them and to find some of the most successful ones, we have collected them for you in a selection that you will adore.
Before sunrise, the sun knocks on Chuck Norris’s window in the morning to ask permission.
Chuck Norris regularly donates blood to the Red Cross, but never his blood, but that of those who dared to tell Chuck Norris jokes in public!
Chuck Norris never wears a watch.
He is the one who decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. But, unfortunately, his heart is not so tame as to attack him.
You live because Chuck Norris let you live after you just read Chuck Norris’s jokes out loud!
Chuck Norris sneezes with his eyes open!
Chuck Norris drowned a fish underwater in a moment of nerves while fishing.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can hear sign language.
Some magicians boast that they can walk on water.
But, of course, nothing is simpler, but do you know that Chuck Norris is the one who swims on Earth?
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door when he gets angry that he didn’t find any fluff in the shoe department!
Chuck Norris makes fire with two ice cubes that he just looks at!
The original title of the movie Alien vs. Predator was, in fact, Alien and Predator vs. Chuck Norris.
But he gave it up because no one would have paid to watch a 5-second film, including the opening credits!
Chuck Norris eats soup with a fork, and don’t you dare imitate him.
Chuck Norris climbed Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he took to take a selfie, and he had no signal at that altitude. Nervous, he read Chuck Norris’s jokes all the way back.
Chuck Norris once threw a boomerang, and it, out of fear, never returned.
The only woman who dared to tell Chuck Norris jokes was Elodia, and we all know the result, right?
Chuck Norris was born in an infernal heat, on January 13, in a cabin they built by him.
Chuck Norris is known for his modesty, so he hardly admits that he is actually the 8th wonder of the world.
There is no atomic bomb. It’s just Chuck Norris when he’s upset that the favorite team lost again and hits the ground with his fists!
Chuck Norris doesn’t ride a motorbike.
He’s the one who actually runs with the motorbike behind him.
Chuck Norris doesn’t make children, so he doesn’t have to beat them.
When Chuck Norris lights a cigarette, it’s daylight.
How lucky for us that he smokes!
When Chuck Norris shows you his middle finger, he doesn’t do it to curse you… he just shows you how many seconds you have left to live around him!