Funny black jokes with no offense.
A man lies on the street in a small town in the country.
The sheriff stands next to him and says:
– Man, you need help?
– No, I am good.
A reporter interviews a man:
– What do you think about the accident that happened last night?
– It was a black night, and I didn’t see anything!
Black humor
Two people in the house:
– What happened, son?
– We don’t have water anymore!
– And now you pray to the gods and ask for rain?
– Nonsense, I call the plumber!
The head of a tribe goes to study in England.
Returning to his village, he takes the wizards aside and tells them:
– You are dusty, you should go to London, because there are some great wizards!
Imagine many people meet on a large field and run like crazy after a leather ball.
Yes, great! It doesn’t even take 10 minutes, and it starts to rain.
One day a man goes to a bar.
He didn’t even get in the door, and a man asked:
– Do you know that this is my house?
Q: How do you get a black tree down?
A: You use a heavy tool.
Are you a fan of black jokes? Read also dark humor jokes.
One man, at one point, received the news that he would be a father.
Of course, the man was happy but thought in the first three months: “Please, be a boy!”
Read a funny collection of black jokes!
– A man loves me for the first time in my life, said a blonde to his friend.
– And what did you think? This one asked, curious.
– Now I finally realize why love is said can hurt sometimes.
Boxing definition: when you get a punch hit in your eyes and see only black.
Funny black jokes about blackjacks.
How do you call a man that plays blackjack?
A player
A man in the train station is walking with a parrot on his shoulder.
A gimmick asks:
– Speaks?
The parrot responds:
-I don’t know. I just received it yesterday!
Why do black people tell funny jokes?
Because they have great humor.
What is the dark side of a black thing?
White
Somewhere in the Wild West, in a bar. There was a man at the counter, shaved on his head, wiping his glasses.
A little man enters and asks for a glass of whiskey. Full of him, the man looks defiantly at him and says:
– Man, if you don’t ask what you want to drink like a man, you don’t get a drop, do you understand?
The little man comes out, enters again and tries to look tougher but fails again.
Really black humor!
Man is upset:
– Look, pale face: I’ll show you how! You go to the counter in my place!
Said and done… The man enters like a tough man who was in the bar, knocks on the door, approaches the counter, hits with his fist the table to break about two glasses and three bottles and shouts:
– Barman, a whiskey!
A man knocks on the door of Heaven. St. Peter opens:
– What are you doing here?
– I’m John Black, and I have the right to come to Heaven because I lived in America, loved a girl, and married her!
“Impossible,” says Peter, unbelievably! Are we in the “Hidden Room” or are you making jokes with me? In our state!?
When did this happen?
– 5 minutes ago.
Q: Why Martin Luther King was a great man?
A: Because he empowers the people with his humor and wise words.
With the lights off, who can count people?
No one
Q: What’s faster than a guy running down the street with a TV?
A: His brother is behind him with the video camera.
Q: What colors are barcodes on products?
A: White and black bars!
At the door of an apartment, you ring a boy:
– Attention, did you make soup?
– Yes, do you want to taste it too?
– No, thanks.
The funniest black jokes in one place
Along with the classic jokes, black jokes are also very popular. Of course, there are many such jokes, but if you want to know which ones are the funniest, the selection below includes them all.
In a country, an adult is asked at school.
– What is the difference between a black and a white car tire?
– The tire it’s just another color!
A guy also goes to a store and asks to talk to the owner.
– What do you have against us?
– Oh, just good words!
Do you know what results if you pair a man with an octopus?
The truth is that I don’t know either, but if you think about it, what comes out will pick up the cotton much faster because it will have eight arms, brother!
Why is the car red? (black joke)
Because the driver wants you to see the car.
What are you doing with that cherry seed?
I want to hug them and break your seed.
An Italian, a Frenchman and a German trip with the train to New York.
At one point, the Italian got hungry and took a slice of pizza full of meat out of his bag. It doesn’t take long for the Frenchman and the German to notice that the Italian only eats meat after the slice of pizza.
– Dear Italian, don’t you like pizza bread?
– I don’t like it, Frenchman!
– But the sauce and what else do you have to eat?
– I don’t eat German. I like meat, it’s meat from my mother, a bit old, but incredibly good.
What happened to your finger? Is that so?
My nail fell out, and I painted my finger black.
How can a turtle turn on its back?
He looks at the tree and falls on his back.
Two black people:
How does a dog look in the basement?
You take the dog, take him to smell the cellar and look at him there.
What does your father do, the teacher asked.
“My father is an engineer,” said Cosmin.
“For me, my father is a teacher,” said Mihai.
“My father is my boss,” John said.
“How come, John,” the teacher asked.
He is the boss of the cemetery, where he cuts the grass and has 300 people under him.
In a country, on a bus. Tired of so many abuses they were subjected to, peoples decide it’s time not to get trampled on, so they move on. Therefore, they start shouting that they want to sit in front as well, that it is the turn of the whites to sit in the back as well. Obviously, it doesn’t take long, and a real scandal starts with screams, fists split, and finally, all the cutlery. The driver, annoyed, stops the bus and starts screaming:
– Yes, what’s this joke?
Right now, you found me on the turn! Come on. I don’t care what color you are. I just don’t listen to black jokes! If I say so, you are all red. Now, take your seats as I tell you. The dark red ones should sit in the back seats, and the light red ones should come here, in front!
In one state, on a school door, there was a large poster: “In this place, all peoples are the same”!
And all people have come to school.
The program of the polo tournament was published in the local newspaper. Thus, a people team will play with animals in the opening match. In the second match, animals will face other animals. In all the other ten matches, the team of people won.
A man also comes out of a circus drunk at night. A woman approaches him:
– Honey, what do you say? Are you coming home with me?
– But do you think I have the money to get where I want right now?
In our country, a man sees two people walking on the side of the road. It accelerates and enters them fully and simply shatters them. One passes through the windshield, while the second is thrown more than 10 meters from the car. A policeman is called to the scene and concludes the report.
– Good, things are clear when going through the window. We are dealing with an attempt to break into the car. What to do next? Ah, yes, run away from the crash site!
Black jokes can be found online, including on profile websites from abroad. Of course, there is a camp for those who condemn those black jokes, but we must admit that there will always be someone who will tell jokes about blacks and others who will laugh at them.
Some of the best black jokes can be found in our selection.
Nobody knows when the first black jokes appeared very well, but have a fun day with black humor.
You can tell your friends and have a good time with these black puns.
The funniest black jokes
There are many black jokes which are undoubtedly full of laughter.
And, you must admit, you laughed at them more than a few times.
Therefore, if you still want to know some new ones, I have prepared a few for you, only good ones to bring you back to your good mood.
-What is the difference between a pigeon and a black one?
– The dove is white, and the black one cannot fly!
– What is worse, being black or not?
– I am human.
Black people no longer have to make black jokes people for their parents so that they understand that they are black…
– What is it called when you throw a black man into the ocean?
– Pollution. Let’s tell some black jokes, shall we?
– How many people do you need to clean a room?
– No way, this is slave labor!
So let’s read jokes with black people!
– What is black and has three legs?
– A black man at the nudist beach.
– Why was white chocolate invented?
– So that blacks don’t bite their fingers at the cinema when the film’s subject catches them…
At a store:
– What do you have against blacks?
– Everything the client wants:
Knives, sticks, daggers, machine guns, grenades!
Just to choose!
-What is the difference between a black man and a canoe?
-A canoe floats on the river…
A car with two blacks arrives at the border and the customs officer.
Asks:
-Did you have a small fire while reading black jokes in the last half hour?
-How is basketball played in South Africa?
– The black man with a green shirt, the crocodiles with red shirts.
– And alibi?
– I read black jokes and bet on crocodiles!
There is a painting by a famous painter in an art gallery, among other works of art.
The entire painting is completely black.
Surprised by what he saw, a visitor asks him:
– What does this painting represent? I do not understand anything!
– You are one of those people who don’t seem to understand art.
It’s nothing, I’ll explain: the painting represents a black man stealing coals at night.
Two French tourists get lost, in Africa, in the savannah, among the bushes.
As they walk, they panic, and suddenly, after about two hours, a black man appears in front of them.
Happy, they try to make him understand what they want to say in English while gesturing:
– Dude, did you see an apple on a bird?
– There are no birds here, it’s just desert, but 3 km further, there is a Boeing 307 on the runway.
Among the most successful jokes that make you laugh every time are those with blacks.
So far from being considered racist, these are simple reasons to laugh a little.
Therefore, read the selection below to find some jokes you probably didn’t know.
Boxing means many white people watch two black people fight and make bets.
– Hello, how are you doing?
– I’m watching a movie.
– What movie?
– The killer shark.
– And what is it about?
– About a black man who had gone out to graze with a cow.
A little advice: never say, “I’m surrounded by fools!” when surrounded by blacks.
Many people might think that you are the core!
The most inspiring black jokes
We don’t want to make dark jokes, but those banks where the main heroes are black people are among the most appreciated.
However, in the lines below, you will not find dark jokes with them but only very funny ones, improving your day.
So all we have to do is invite you to discover each of them.
Jokes with lesser-known blacks
– Why does Steve Wonder laugh all the time?
– He discovered that Ray Charles is black but doesn’t know he is the same.
Why does Ray Charles swing left and right when he sings?
Because the last time when he performed with Steve Wonder, he kept rocking back and forth, and that’s how they collided.
– What did God say when he created the first man, and he was black?
– Off, I burned that one.
Let’s see from now on what the angels will start telling jokes about black people.
A naked black man with a cherry between teeth gets into a taxi. The taxi driver asks him:
– What are you doing, man, naked and with a cherry in your mouth?
– I’m going to a carnival and I’m a chocolate candy with cherry filling.
Now, will you take me faster to where I have to go, or do I have to tell you black people jokes like the guy from the grocery store where I bought the cherry?
– What is worse, being black or gay?
– To be human.
Black people do not have to confess to their parents that they are black!
– What is it called when you throw a black man into the ocean?
– Pollution.
Black-friendly jokes for everyone
– What is the only white thing about a black person?
– Master…
– What is the difference between a black and a tire?
– The tire does not sing if you put winter chains on it.
How many people do you need to wash a car?
No, brother, it’s just known that this is black work.
The master on the plantation, to his black slaves
– Because I read some friendly black jokes today, I decided to sit you down and bathe today.
Joy at the top.
– In the pool with sulfuric acid!
– Black people, today we will give you a disco!
Applause, cheers, chants.
– John will play the machine gun!
– So that you can relax, play football today!
Hooray, lovelies!
– On the minefield!
What is the difference between a Negro and a black person?
As far as you can see.
Why do blacks have whiter palms and soles?
They were still walking on all fours when God painted them.
How do you save a black man from drowning?
You hit him hard in the head with the anchor.
Short but good jokes
Have you heard of the last head of the Ku Klux Klan?
He announced that he wanted to enter the Book of Records.
So, after thinking it over, he announced that he would try to jump over 50 blacks with the bulldozer.
In Kansas, the policeman asks a black man:
– Can you identify yourself?
– Wow, are we allowed to do this alone already?
A black man enters a store in Alabama, black with annoyance:
– Listen, do you whites have something against blacks?
– Well, I don’t know what you want.
You can find everything here.
You just have to choose what you need: flowers!
If you are in New York and have a gun with a single bullet, and you have to choose between shooting a white and a black, which one do you choose?
Shoot the white because the black cannot be Hungarian!
In the subway, a very dissatisfied old woman apostrophizes a black student who was sitting quietly on the seat:
– Here, ladies sit on chairs in America, and young men like you stand!
– Here in Africa, boys like me sit around the fire, and ladies like you sit in the cauldron, boiling because it is known that the old hen makes good juice!
What is black with one leg?
A lame nigger, but you’ve already figured that out.
What is black with two legs?
A black man who is not lame. Seriously, didn’t you have more serious questions?
What is a black man with three legs?
A piano!
What is the difference between a black and a pizza?
The pizza doesn’t wobble or scream like it’s been grabbed when put in the oven.
A car with two blacks arrives at the border, and the customs officer asks:
Did you have a small fire on the road?